VerveEarth


Monday, June 02, 2008

Choices and Responsibility

Hello, everyone~!

To tell the truth, I have nothing special to write today, but I somehow decided to fill today's space with something. So, I tried for a moment to look back at the conversations I've had these days.

Well, what came to my mind was that the conversation I've had with my friend about our own future, especially job-hunting. She's third year right now, so she almost had no idea how it would be done and turn out. I was on the same path as well, so I could understand what she's feeling about the upcoming job-hunting. It seems so far and far away from actually doing it for now. But it's really getting closer actually.

And one of the things she said was that she's not sure what she wants to do in the future. Being able to choose is a really good thing. But when there's too many to choose from, especially when it comes to choosing the things that may change your life path, you'll be stuck and will feel like you want to stop thinking about that. I guess that's what my friend has been doing for years. Though choices are on the table, she's chosen not to choose because it keeps her away from taking responsibility for what she chooses. (But on the other hand, I hate to see the people try to have everything they want and at the end they fail to do so. I'm not saying that trying is a bad thing, but I sometimes hope that people make a decision with more responsibility. Don't you think? But is it a reality after all?)

For me, it means getting nothing after all. If it were me, I would ask myself if it's what I'm living for, choosing to not choose. From my point of view, it's a bit sad to know that she thinks that way actually. However, I guess it's fine as long as she accepts. And what she values most in her life would be different from mine, obviously.

The moment like this, I always wonder how I should give advices in a way that I and she can agree on. I'm not quite sure about that. It's okay to give my opinion, but at the same time, it means that I disagree with her opinion. So it would definitely break the harmony which is important for the Japanese culture.

Hmmm...I just can't make a clear conclusion for it and I need to think about it more and more.

What do you think?
See you soon!

1 comment:

Nina Liakos said...

This post reminds me of a poster I saw a long time ago and liked: "Not to decide is to decide." It means that if a person avoids making a decision, s/he is, in fact, making another kind of decision. It's often true, don't you think?

I agree with you about having too many choices; it can be a bad thing, and people do get stuck. It's a lot of responsibility to choose a life path when you are young and don't really know what you want. I know in the past in Japan, once you took a job with a company, you were expected to stick with it forever--your company became almost like your family, and you can't resign from your family and choose another one you like better! Is it still true? Here in the US, it's not uncommon to switch majors in college and to switch careers in midlife. Many older people retire from one career and start a new one, sometimes in a more creative field than they were in before, like art; or they open their own business. There's a lot of flexibility. Of course it all depends on there being enough jobs to go around. When unemployment is high, people take what they can get.

I've stayed in the same career all my working life and am now nearing retirement. When I finally retire, I expect I will probably teach part-time somewhere or maybe teach as a volunteer, because I really enjoy it. I am lucky.